Newly Parents | Newlyweds To First Time Parents…and Everything in Between

NewlyParents #8 – Just Like The Movies

// January 25th, 2010 // No Comments » // qotd

In marriage, sometimes the simplest conversation can go awry. You never know when you might get a little marital jab.

Wifey: Aww, being an adult is hard isn’t it?

Husband: I know! I wish I were six years old again!

Husband: Hey this is just like in the movies. I wished I were six years old right before bed so when I wake up I will be six again and won’t turn back into an adult until I learn a valuable lesson!

Wifey: Or you could just wake up and be stupid.

Newly Parents #7 – French Fried!

// December 13th, 2009 // No Comments » // qotd

When planning to steal your spouses french fries, you must be careful not to offend the Fry Gods.

Wifey: Can I have one of your fries?

Husband: No, this is my dinner!

Wifey: (steals a fry) *Yoink!*

Husband: Hey!

Wifey: OW! HOT! HOT!

Husband: See? That’s what happens when you steal fries!

Newly Parents #5 – Gas Happens

// December 7th, 2009 // No Comments » // Baby, qotd

With pregnancy, comes gas, and lots of it!

Wifey: *Frrrrrppp*

Husband: Oh that’s nasty honey!

Wifey: The baby is making me do it!

Husband: Don’t you blame your farts on the baby! Baby farts are cute. There is nothing cute about what you just did!

Quote of the Day – At The Movies

// November 27th, 2009 // 1 Comment » // qotd

While waiting in line to watch New Moon, Husband reminds Wifey how much he does not want to see the movie.

Wifey: I went to see A Christmas Carol with you and I didn’t want to see that.

Husband: Yeah that movie wasn’t very good BUT it was in 3D so that made it better.

Wifey: I don’t care if they showed a turd in 3D, that doesn’t mean I want to see it!

Husband: That was an interesting analogy.

Quote of the Day – How Big Is Your Turkey?

// November 25th, 2009 // 1 Comment » // qotd

Husband: Dad gave me a turkey today. I thought we could take it to your Moms.

Wifey: Oh good! What size is it?

Husband: I don’t know what sizes turkeys come in.

Wifey: Is it bigger than a chicken?

Husband: I don’t know what sizes chickens are either. I know what size a chicken strip is. It’s bigger than a chicken strip. Does that help?

Wifey: You’ve never had to cook for yourself have you?